More Weekend Kitsch, National Cathedral Edition

The National Cathedral has its own, if limited, brand of kitsch.

The Cathedral itself is Episcopal, and not governmentally funded, but they like to pretend that they are -- what's the word for "open to all other religious faiths." In evidence, they point to such things as visits by the Dalai Lama as the use of the cathedral by two Jewish congregations (do Jewish congregations actually refer to themselves as "congregations"? I'm horribly ignorant on some of these finer points -- some of the larger ones, too). This is "openness" is also reflected at points in the gift shop. Of course, I'm interested in some of the near comical ways. Comical to me, the insensitive atheist, anyway.

For instance, they sell all sorts of distinctly Catholic religious items, such as medals, prayer cards, and rosaries, including rosary rings. I may be wrong in identifying these items as strictly Catholic, because I am uncertain as to how many Catholic practices were retained by the Anglican, then Episcopal, churches. Still, let's face it, that's not my point.

My point is this, the Mother of All Rosaries:

The rosary beads are the size of a child's fist, and the crucifix and image of Mary and Jesus were both larger than my hand. You see it draped in half over the corner of a baker's rack display. I held it up and the thing was about as tall as I was. It must be for some sort of decoration or display or theatricality in a service. Otherwise, all I could think was that you must have done some damn big sinning to need a rosary that large.

Maybe it was meant for people like me?

I didn't find too many Jewish items in the adult section. I failed to take a picture of the Menorah Christmas tree ornament (falling down on the job, I know!). Never fear, I do want to go back with binoculars to see more of the gargoyles. I'll take it then.

In the children's section, they had a nice, little display for Jewish youngsters which might also be purchased for Christian youngsters so that they could learn a bit about the Hebrew faith. My favorite, of course, was The Matzah Man, there on the right. I might also like that Hebrew letters kit, too:
Although they had items related to Buddhism in the adult section, they had none for children. They also had absolutely nothing in the tchotchke category having anything to do with Islam or Hinduism.

This being a Christian organization, of course, that shouldn't surprise me, especially since they only singled out the Dalai Lama and the use of the building by Jewish congregations. Including all religions, especially those that were not connected to anything that occured in the cathedral, might not fulfill the mission of the shop nor be cost-effective.

Meanwhile, Christian children could play Bible games, both by answering questions about the Old Testament and by - I don't know - playing Jesus and the Money Changers with the "coins of the New Testament":
Actually, Jesus and the Money Changers would be a cool game. That was Bad Ass Jesus acting like a Dirty Anti-Capitalist and preventing the desecration of the Temple.

In fact, when I was a little girl in New Orleans among all of those Catholic kids going through confirmation and such, we used to play similar games in the backyard. Jesus was always imaginary, and we girls were always much more militant apostles than those in the Bible. Then, we discovered Little House on the Prairie and we were all about building those little houses.

Speaking of little girls, yours could be Jesus's princess:
That, or she's being stalked by Pedophile Jesus, which I don't think was in the Bible or apocrypha.

I'm going to Hell for "Pedophile Jesus." Probably for "Bad Ass Jesus," too. I should go back and get that Mother of All Rosaries. Or perhaps I should just get this:
That's a tiny little Bible, printed out on a small, square piece of plastic, much like microfiche. You can keep it with you at all times. I'm not sure what good it does if you need a microfiche reader to find any helpful passages; but, it's still kinda cool, just the same, and people like my grandmother would probably just like to have it for the comfort they get from the idea.

Actually, my grandmother would have liked it because she would have felt morally superior to those who were around her who didn't have it; but that's just her.

While I must admit that would have liked a "Heroes and Heroines of the Bible" action figure series. (I've seen them. I swear!) The cathedral gift shop, overall, refrained from such potential blasphemies as bobble-headed Jesus or Jesus action figures, or even "Buddy Christ." (O.k., maybe not with the "Secret Admirer" t-shirt.) It maintained a level of taste, education, and respect appropriate to a shop located inside of a religious building and run by a religious foundation.

Of course, I wonder what Jesus would have thought about a gift shop in a church?

On another note, as I continue this Kitsch series, I'm finding that I want a more precise definition of "kitsch" and philosophies about kitsch. The first time that I recall encountering the word was in The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera -- book, not movie. Kundera positioned kitsch as the opposite of art, mass-produced and meant to appeal to the lowest common denominator. I've been conflating adult kitsch with children's toys. I'm also interested in this kitsch and its depiction of historical subjects. I'm wondering more and more at those connections. That perhaps should be another post for another time.